Does anyone happen to remember that time I waxed eloquently about reflecting on the type of mother I wanted to be one day? I even preached about it in my first-Sunday-back-to-work-sleep-deprived-state-of-new-motherhood sermon. I remember that I made some correlation to how we each have to constantly ask ourselves what type of Christian we want to be.
What I know now that I didn't know then is that I am probably two dozen different types of mother in any given day! I'm the cuddly, loving mom who will of course read one more story. The silly-sing-songs-about-everything mom. The impatient, frustrated mom. The exhausted-I-just-want-you-to-go-to-sleep mom. The I-wish-you-would-wake-up-so-I-could-actually-have-time-with-you-today mom. The hippy "we don't watch tv" mom. The modern "here - entertain yourself with my cell phone" mom. The healthy meal-planner mom. The bribe-the-child-with-a-cookie mom. The schedules and routines matter mom. The flexible and it'll-be-a-good-experience mom. And these were all just this afternoon!
And so, yes, I do still believe that we can and should reflect on the types of parents (grands/teachers/guardians, etc.) we want to be. But we also need to remember that our relationships are fluid and ever-changing. And that's okay. Jesus himself once said, "blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called children of God" (Clearly, he spoke old English...), as well as saying he came not to bring peace, but a sword. So confusing. Truth be told, it is probably going to be as hard for our children to figure out what types of parents we were to them (hopefully with the help of caring therapists!) as it is for us to figure out what Jesus really was like during his time on earth and what God was, and is, and ever will be. And that's okay. Because relationships are fluid and ever-changing.
Sometimes I need God to be my cuddly mom who will bear with me for one more story. Sometimes I need God to be the schedules and routines matter parent and other times need the flexibility. Oftentimes, I need grace that's as sweet as the promise of a cookie. When we try to describe our relationship with God, I hope and pray that it is as complicated as describing our relationship with our children. Because it doesn't mean that God is changing who God is. It's just this simple: we are beloved children of God...with an ever-changing relationship with our Creator, Redeemer, and Sustainer.
Grace and Peace,
Susan
